no-no jojo :)

Today was quite an interesting day. Actually it was one of those "most scary moments as a mommy". At 12:45 this afternoon Joanna ingested some medication that she shouldn't have. She went out of my sight for at the most 2 minutes and when I went looking for her I was amazed at what she had accomplished. My mama ended up calling 911 and there was both an ambulance and a fire truck! She didn't want the firemen to touch her, but one of them made her a balloon glove face thing and she was batting her eyes at him like she does so well :) The paramedic called poison control and they said that with the size of her and the amount that she could of possibly ingested, it was more and likely toxic. I was petrified! I mean, when Levi fell down the stairs yesterday, yeah I cried, but you could see right away that he was OK (despite some bumps and bruises) HOWEVER when your child could of taken something that was so harmful to them, and you cant do anything about it YEAH that brought the shaking out of me! She was definitely the best Jojo that we all know and love, all smiles and giggles. That is except for when they tried to strap her on the gurney. They have these really neat 5 point straps for children. Once we were on our way to the hospital she was having a good time. She didn't like the big rigs that would come up behind us but we convinced her that YES they do stop. She let the paramedic check her blood pressure and stick the heart monitor on her. Her pulse was a little low but once we got to the ER the nurse said she may just be really relaxed. I'm sure she was more relaxed then I. She had to be observed for no less then 4 hours because it was an extended release pain medication. I ENTERTAINED this child for more then 4 hours WITHOUT her getting off that bed!! WOOHOO look at me!! The pictures above were after she had to drink charcoal *Bluck* she made some of the silliest faces, but they were so cute. The nurse said it really wasn't flavorful but it is gritty. After seeing some very sad things in the ER we were blessed with a Jojo that was just really sleepy from the adventures from today. She fell asleep on the way home at 530.

Both the nurse and the paramedic said at separate times that they needed to make sure that they seemed like the bad guys and I was the good guy. They would never ask me to hold her down or do anything that would make me seem like a bad guy. I told them all at some point or another.... LOL.... that that wasn't how it was gonna work. I told them that since she does see the doctor so much for other medical problems and she does feel safe around everyone that we needed to try and keep it that way. SURPRISINGLY they were understanding and just fine about it. I can't tell you how many times I use to be so scared to state my feelings on medical problems for any of the kids, because I was worried that they would shoot me down or know BETTeR then I. But that's not the case at all. We must stand up as their parents to do what we think is right for them, they will listen and if they don't.... find someone else that can!

They eventually took the heart monitor tabs off her belly and chest, but unfortunately she was allergic to the latex in them... not the sticky part, but the other part. She has the biggest hive/welts on her poor little chest!

We saw a lot of sad people in there. One elderly lady (probably 70-80 years old) was beaten by someone else, but she walked on into the ER herself, no ambulance needed. very strong lady I think! There was another lady who, at 1:30 came in and had been drinking since 10 am and was so sick and in pain. I only know and can share these things because we had to sit on the bed in the hallway due to how closely she had to be watched. EVERYONE of the doctors and nurses knew she was there. They brought her a big orange Popsicle and LOVED it :) Overall it was really sad to see all those people in there in a lot of pain one way or another. We are lucky and more importantly blessed to of had her watched over by the Lord. I was a nervous, useless wreck for a time of this, and I wasn't able to even sign my name well :P

Thanks for all the prayers!!! they are much appreciated and we do feel so loved <3

(when I edit this it comes up with the different paragraphs but once I save and or publish they disappear SORRY guys, I'm not being sloppy.... really!)

Some quick thoughts....

1 peter 5: 6-10

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."

I thought that was a great verse when I read it tonight. I have obviously been more open about what is going on then I should be at times, and hopefully the Lord will forgive me and help me to not give more then I should. I pray I remember to show the Lord through me and I am struggling to do so. I have recently been evil at times, and I do not want the Devil to use that against me. I have so much going through my head. I was unable to sleep last night because there is so much stress and loneliness. I know the Lord is with me if I allow him to be there. He's there even if I do not want him to be, and in those time I pray I can cling to him even more.

I feel like I am alone, stressed, tired and depressed. I can not tell if that is all the devil trying to wiggle his way in the changes in my life or if its just the crazy life that we are in the middle of. I just want to wake up and have everything perfect, in order, in place, and taken care of. I am trying to cast all my anxieties to him, but it's so hard in those moments to do so. I want everything to fall in place. Although I know the Lords plan seems awfully different then my own. BUT STILL. I struggle with my human nature, my human flesh. I know that's not an excuse, but for now it's the only thing I can think of. However I think about these things all the time.

ok enough about that...
There was a scary moment today: Levi took a nasty tumble down a flight of 6 stairs today. I could only watch it happen. I started crying even before he hit the ground. He did some weird cart-wheel thing and I was PETRIFIED that he had gotten really hurt. He seemed like he was really contorted as the tumble went. He has a few splinter in his arms, and hands. His shoulder looks like road rash after a crash. he also has that on his cheek and right above his ear along with a pretty nasty bump. the bottom inside of one foot is messed up and I wonder if he slipped with that foot and that is what caused him to go. his knees are scratched good. his hands a little scrapped he's got a weird gash on his pointer and pinkie finger. He fell down my parents stairs about a week ago (not quite that dramatic) he just had a good bump on his head. I think it was around the same spot and it concerns me. Call me over protective mama. Both situations were scary but I was crying with this one.

I guess that is enough for tonight.

Who knows what happens- GOD knows!

I wrote this blog back in June: http://ohmywordfive.blogspot.com/2009/06/my-best-friend.html I kinda wish I hadn't, I know I could go and delete it. I cant really because it would break my heart more then the messed up situation. However that is over with I just have one hurt feeling about it and yes I'm gonna say it to everyone because it hurts that bad and if you can't apologize for this one thing our friendship can never be: "I bought you coffee everyday for a week after Lois-Mae died, you don't seem to care enough to do that for me over a very bad tooth-ache" (I do believe it was a very painful thing. Now even though I have that in quotes, it is definitely not word for word. However my point.... that it feels CRUEL to me that someone would say something like that and use a dead child in that way. I'm surprisingly over the ANGER of it and is more in shock. I still love her! I'm probably crazy but I think there is so much that went on that I had/have no clue about at the time that things got WAY out of control. I did learn that I am not a happy person when hung up on and will NEVER do that to anyone else. I don't like to air dirty laundry and I don't know how this will sit. I still very much have a place for her in my heart, because I feel like we are sisters-in-Christ and having that bond is a blessing to experience.

Why do I bring this up, I don't know maybe because whenever I think of her the first thing that comes to mind is that. I hate that it's that way and would love it to go away. I feel like I have tried way more then others are saying is necessary ( by others I mean Daniel and mama).

Why am I thinking about her? because it's her birthday, and no matter what has happened/will happen/is happening I pray that she can have the best birthday EVER!

Happy birthday to you...
Happy birthday to you...
Happy birthday dear Brieanne...
Happy birthday to you!

We all know God didn't give me the beautiful voice like so many others seem to have so it may save your ears this way :) either way:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

In the palms of our hands- In the LORDS hands

I had this idea of coming on tonight to talk about some of my fears that I have realized over the last few weeks. Are they fears or just anxieties? But I had to change that plan when I looked and saw the date. There were many strange things from today related to Lois-Mae. I can not believe that even going though the things that seemed related to her today it took me until just a short while ago to realize that today was what it was.

- 5 months ago we had Lois-Mae. I miss her greatly! I was driving around earlier actually looking for a video game (wow GUILT anyone)I stopped at the intersection of joiner parkway and 1st street. I was feeling this huge tugging to turn and go down 1st street to the graveyard. It was 8:04 and I thought oh no I don't need to go there, just keep going. I hate that I kept driving. I wish I would have went down there to the graveyard, and cried there at her grave instead of sitting here grieving/crying alone. Was she the one pulling me down there, calling out to me and I wasn't listening? As Christian's are we not taught that her spirit is in heaven? Then was it her pulling me, or my heart pulling me towards the place I know her body lays?

Mom told me today that her and her doctor were having this conversation about a friend of hers, she was telling mom that this friend went in for an ultrasound at 5 months and the baby had no heart beat. *sniff* anyways she was told by quite a few doctors here that her insurance would only cover for her to have a D&C instead of allowing her to have her child birthed. (That in itself should be wrong- and if you could actually bring yourself to do that to your childs body... I can't even explain how angry that would make me) She ended up fighting for so long with the insurance company, that she carried the baby to term anyways and had labor. She did birth the baby and due to how long the baby had passed before the birth the baby had actually lost her skin and was decaying. Praise God she didn't get sick from the baby! They ended up having a service for the child. Isn't it sad though that the mom could actually make it through that physically and/or mentally? I can't imagine KNOWING that the baby had died yet continue to carry her that much longer.

I miss Lois-Mae so very much I can't imagine my life with her though. She should be here now with our family, thriving, if she would of waiting until we were suppose to. I know that God has her, I know that she has a better life then I could have given her but it is so hard. I feel so guilty going through days and not thinking about her. I wish there was a way for me to tell her how much I love her. I never got to tell her that! At least if she would have been here for a short time I could have shared with her how much I love and care for her. I understand that the Lord wanted her, but I wanted to love her too.

It's so hard to feel this way and Daniel not being here with me. I just need HIM to be here and love on me, and tell me all those things. To share with me his love and allow me to share that with him. I hate being separated from any one of my family because I'm scared I will never see them again. I want to be able to share my love to everyone, to give love to those who have never felt that from anyone. I know God's love is bigger and better then I could give but maybe he could use me for that. I have days (like today) where I just want to ask why on some many things but feels like I can't because my love for God, his Mercy's and grace for her.

What do I do, where do I go from here. I think sometimes of the different things she should be doing, different things that I wish I could of seen her do. we've had MANY miscarriages. but it feels nothing like loosing a child you can see. A child with hands, fingers, toes, a child that.... fits in the palms of your hands

.With all the other stresses in my life, in OUR life right now my brain feels crazy.

Plain and simple: I feel ran over by a semi-truck.

I love my family

Isn't it crazy how you can go through or hear the same thing over and over again and then one day it seems like it just SMACKS you right in your face?

There is a lot of crazy insane statisics about things everyday. Right now one of the main things is the working environment. Who has a job that is secure? we are blessed to know that we do but so many others don't.

I think about how much simpler these things seemed to me as a kid. Did I ever worry about where money came from? did I ever worry about school? health care? retirement? How different do we picture all these things when we are kids? You have this dream of growing up and being "place career here". But we never really think about what would happen if we don't get there. Did anyone ever burst your bubble there? Isn't it sad? Now as an adult not only do I think about those things about Daniel and I but now I think about what it will be like for my children.

There's a lot of things going on right now: car trouble, not having us together as our 6 person family unit (plus a dog lol), lack of housing, Ben starting school, not being able to afford Jena going to school, Jo's medical, and so on and so forth. I just wish and pray for my family to be together again. I don't care how much money it costs' for the car to be fixed so they can get themselves, here, with the three of us, I don't care how we get a home because I know God will provide. I know Ben has to start school next week and I would love to have an alternate decision but he really does need to go and we will suck up living in tiny TLF for a while. I will home school Jena because she to needs to learn something and maybe that will give me the time and strength to see what Jo maybe able to achieve. God only knows whats in store for Jo and wherever he leads we will follow and know that she is in His hands and he has ultimate control. I just want and pray for a few things: that Daniel gets home and shares his strengths with me so we can encourage each other in Gods word and teach our children. I want to see my two big kids, and that the Lord just places things where they need to go and we can all work together to continue in that path.

I think I mainly just miss my hubby. I miss his strengths and his weaknesses. I miss him just holding me even if I don't want to be touched lol. I wanna make him dinner, and him tell me how much he loves it. I want him to tell me (while looking at me) how much he Loves me.

Ephesians 5:22-32
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.

1 Corinthians 7
Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.

Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. Was a man already circumcised when he was called? He should not become uncircumcised. Was a man uncircumcised when he was called? He should not be circumcised. Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing. Keeping God's commands is what counts. Each one should remain in the situation which he was in when God called him. Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you—although if you can gain your freedom, do so. For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. Brothers, each man, as responsible to God, should remain in the situation God called him to.

Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are. Are you married? Do not seek a divorce. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.

What I mean, brothers, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they had none; those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep; those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.

I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.

If anyone thinks he is acting improperly toward the virgin he is engaged to, and if she is getting along in years and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not sinning. They should get married. But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin—this man also does the right thing. So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does even better.

A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. In my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is—and I think that I too have the Spirit of God.

I know I put the whole chapter in there. I know only part of it is about marriage but i didn't want to chop it all up. Kinda takes away from it.

1 Corinthians 13
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

I am anxious to see what the Lord has in store for our little family :) I Love my family oh so much! <3

Just another day in the Laird home...

.... or the lack of our Laird home anyways.
I've come to realize how much we are homeless right now. I always hated that thought. As military they will ship you to where they want you to go but cant always give you a place to live. In the process of this HORRIBLE house hunting experience we had decided first and foremost that we would Go wherever the Lord leads us and wants us to go. We wanted to believe and PRAYED hard that the Lord would open doors for us to jump right on through. Learning basically that the footprints in the sand poem was true:


One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,
"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,
"The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you."
Mary Stevenson

I would normally try and find a bible verse to go there but Lord forgive me for my laziness.. Now that I have guilt I think I might search for one in a minute.

So I did feel guilty and after completing MY blog i went in search of what the LORD would want me to hear and one was this:
Deuteronomy 1:31NIV
“There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place."

John 14:18-20
"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him.”


-Back to my main thought-
-anyways-

They (as in the military and the doctors) were trying to find to the best place for our family. We just knew that no matter where we were picked to go it was of God. However I know I forgot that even through the Lord picked this place, Satan would still try and do whatever he could to block out paths. I think mainly in ways to try and hit me at my week points and make me angry. He definitely has done so and I haven't even thought to chill in the moment. I was doing so good over the last year at trying to create less anger in me, and ask God to be in all situations in my life. Again, over the past few weeks, honestly haven't been so bright in remember to do such things :(

-we must try to look at the goodness he has shown us in all bad situations and we should be faithful to whatever is there that we can SEE him in everything.-

Mom and I had a horrible airplane ride and I was so glad mom was there because we were able to remind one another that God is indeed in control of all this and he will make us through. We both knew we would make it through that was never a question....however... we got to the point of not knowing how or when :) In the end he was faithful to us and showed us peace and mercy.

Poor Daniel and poor skip have had some pretty nasty car troubles, we know its gonna be costly and we know the Lord will provide us with that and the things we need rather then we want. They are days behind and will continue to be days further behind. I feel so bad for them because of all that and I knew how excited they all were about going to the grand canyon. There have been a few times Daniel has call me with a laugh. *short story time* He called me earlier today at the hotel trying to fax me yet again more paper work for "The House" (probably more unfortunate sad story on that later-anyways) and he was laughing so hard, he was trying to tell me a story about how he had stopped and grizzly apparently didn't notice, I guess he thought Daniel was gonna walk out the door and take him for a walk lol that of course was not the case. So he had a run in with a very clean glass door lol (its not the first time) I'm sure he yelped and didn't at all appreciate the laugh his person was giving him. But yes it was funny... shoot its funny when anyone does it! am I right?* He called me when they were driving through Texas (which if you know Ben you know how crazy he is about that place, Daniel and I think it's a natural breed in for those folk) and Ben was in the back talking all about Texas and how he couldn't believe they were there. I would of loved to of heard all he was saying. Sad: he wanted a hat FROM Texas and as much as Daniel wanted to get him one they were already so far behind just from construction and traffic.... STOP WITH ALL THE CONSTRUCTION WILL YOU!! I KNOW PEOPLE NEED JOBS IN EVERY STATE BUT YO-HO-HO CHILL!! (yes purposely in all caps lol) Now they are stuck in flagstaff (as previously stated) with a car that at the moment does not work. Here's another AWESOME story!!! This is a God story people! They were stopped at a gas station (or something) in the middle of no where except for being New Mexico. They were trying to see if they could figure out something about the car. (Obviously they didn't really) Right next to them there was a guy also broke down. You know Daniel hes the talking kind so proceeded to yap :) oh dear how I LOVE you so! Apparently this gentleman's father is actually a pastor at a church in vacaville California -Cha-bam!- where might we be moving to?? (if you had been following my blog you would know the answer to this question haha) that's right fellow friends: vacaville California. now what are the chances of two total strangers both so far from home, broke down in the same place, meeting, chatting and learning such information? God is good isnt he. So Daniel called me later to tell me that he thought he would check out the church. Plus, he felt so bad for the guy cause he couldn't help. :(

Now that I am here Ive had so many new thoughts and questions come about from this house. I want to throw my hands up to and say bla. I can't though because we already have money into it and the human part of me is getting more voice in then Lord in me and I need to stop, Pray about it, put the Lord in it for us and ask the questions to everyone that is the right people to ask it too. Get what we need and see where the Lord leads up too. Does he want us there in that house? what neighbor does he have in store for us that needs us? Or is it not and we are looking in all the wrong places? Don't you just wish sometimes that there was something that told you what you need to do and where you need to go.

There's a lot of stress and so much more then what is above that we've got to do and remember that the Lord is in all and will get us through all.

And a few more verse I feel from the Lord:
Isaiah 41:10
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

“The Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9.

I really need to think of good titles

I should probably make a list of stupid random titles that I can pick from at anytime. I know I could write what the actual blog is about in the title but what fun is that? I don't think I ever stick to one subject in any given blog anyways, so unless I want to make a list in the title of everything in that blog I think I need to be creative and have some ideas ahead of time :) However I probably wont do that.

I am up at 2 am and being forced to watch "Alvin and the chipmunks". Luckily my daddy has it recorded on his X-Box, because Joanna's copy is pretty scratched up. I don't think it's a bad movie, and pretty happy that Jo has decided to stretch her movie preferences from ONLY Barney. I mean I do enjoy walking around my house singing random Barney tunes, But wouldn't I look much cooler to be singing the latest song of the week? Well, I don't think I would know what that is, so maybe I should stick with kids songs. Wait they arnt even normal kids songs. Although my life is made up of making children happy with "twinkle, Twinkle little star" & "The itsy bitsy spider" lets broaden our horizons.... any suggestions? wow that was way out in left field!

Back to the subject: I was hoping, well I think we were all hoping, that we would come out to California and Joanna would be miraculously healed... I've learned that is now clearly not true. I have a few clues to why she is up at 2 am wheezing like crazy. Is it the fact that we needed milk so instead of taking the time and driving 10-15 miles to buy the lactose free milk that she should be drinking from a little place called WALMART for $2.88 a half gallon yet I chickening out and went to Raley's just to find out that it is $3.99 a gallon? Refusing to pay such an outrageous price for what should of been a no brainer, I buy the regular good old fashion NOT straight from a cow, milk. OR: is it from just being around such new allergens and atmosphere? Either way it really is an eye opener and frankly sucks! Does this just prove that it wont matter where we go the child will be sick? It's funny how you can tell the difference in the sound of the cough and wheezing that we are in a dry climate instead of such a humid one. She maybe coughing/wheezing but she isn't puking from an over abundance of mucous! (I know TMI, but you are the one who decided to read:)lol)

I do not know what we are gonna do but I know that this whole move... buying a house... trying to get settled (which happens to be a long list of calls, dr.s, and research) is a bit more stressful then I thought it would be.

I guess it has been nice to have my mommy and daddy and be here for the lovely birth of my new baby cousin, or my cousins baby LOL.

Even though there is so much to do I am obviously procrastinating and would rather just let dear husband take care of it all. I applaud single parents... I'm exhausted and haven't even started doing anything. Lord help me when I do:).

Alright so I'm really nauseous from being up so late and hoping that Jo will fall asleep sometime soon, because I still have to get up when Levi wakes up in a few hours!

There's a sad sort of clanging from the clock in the hall
And the bells in the steeple too
And up in the nursery an absurd little bird
Is popping out to say "cuckoo"
Cuckoo, cuckoo

Regretfully they tell us Cuckoo, cuckoo
But firmly they compel us Cuckoo, cuckoo
To say goodbye . . .
Cuckoo!
. . . to you

So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night
I hate to go and leave this pretty sight

So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, adieu
Adieu, adieu, to yieu and yieu and yieu

So long, farewell, au revoir, auf wiedersehen
I'd like to stay and taste my first champagne

So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye
I leave and heave a sigh and say goodbye -- Goodbye!
I'm glad to go, I cannot tell a lie
I flit, I float, I fleetly flee, I fly
The sun has gone to bed and so must I

So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbyeGoodbye, goodbye, goodbye

Oh, and a DEFINITE side post: Jo just peed on the potty chair! that's right it's 2 am and Jo peed on the potty <3